Why don’t I write to newspaper anymore?

Bob is a long time acquaintance from our former glory days of youth. We have known and wizened ourselves from the school of Hard Knocks n Bumps, our diplomas of merit are near??. He looks like a professor of  Diplomas etuis’ Emeritus quo sancta humanae and speaks as such..

*recently Bob had some medical issues which has taken his ability to speak and that is so sad indeed. 

My Friend Bob asked me one day why don’t I write to paper anymore. Bob, I, said, its like this, there is so much to write about that the local paper scarcely does its job as it is. For me to write them and criticize or inform them of the social injustices that be fall us would be over whelming. We both can articulate on anything from the idiots on council, the overpriced rec center, the wasted treatment plant, to the mundane.

But, you can’t write about it as the newspaper and the city hall siesta together and indeed make strange bed fellows and that’s is all that I am going to say, unless asked for further opinions. The audacious squeaks that emit when THEY walk are not from their shoes.(in my humble opinion).

That’s why THEY have to censor most of the news that is local to us readers. THEY in fact don’t care about too much what happens in the community as long as its big news. For example the” exclusion of the Lord’s Pray at council meetings”, maybe. To me that should have had more coverage than it did.

You can blame the people that don’t care as long as THEIR right to know what is going on is expressed in a clear and transparent manner. What bullshit, the government of the day can’t do that and we the little people demand this of our city bureaucrats. Hey-now, social equality lives.!, so it does.

(their are numerous idiot’s on council, but one female in particular which is anti-creed),thought it was “exclusive” of certain peoples rights to say a opening prayer. Well, THESE people didn’t care one way or the other, THEY never mentioned it. Having nothing more intelligent to do with THEIR time, THEY decided to jump on the “spiritual” bandwagon and make a commotion.(two of a kind spells danger.)

 I offer no apology towards this person because she is just doing her job and I am doing mine, madam, you are an idiot, the best I have ever seen. You are a “LULU”.  Your justification for intelligence escapes me. Bullshit will baffle brains and common sense, when applied in a substantial portion of deceitfulness.

There was so much to do about this that even writing and asking to reconsider was considered as an act of defiance, I just want the prayer to be said as usual and THOSE whom are insulted can leave and return when it’s over. Hell, if you went to THOSE other spiritual places do you think THEY quit saying their prayers because you all were “exclusive” , hell no,!! either like it or get outta the mosque.

Well, you know the results,  the idiots have caved in, to the other idiots all in the name of being political correct, bullshit again. And if you dare raise this subject, all the prime and proper, get pissed.

Folks, my mother-in-law, Summed this best “its all going to hell in a hand basket”. All the people that made this country what it is, must be turning in their graves, because of  so called intelligent people. The reason you were elected to office is, a better chance of us , to “tar n feather” if you did a piss poor job.

Did I mention that I wasn’t from here.!!?  This is why Bob, I don’t write to the paper.!!, THEY, can’t print this. This is too, exclusive.!! As I am only picking on one or two idiots, better I slander the whole council and make it worth my while, maybe fresh fodder for the newspaper.

Your friend in your debt, lets us pray,

Bruce

"May the idiots we entrusted power to, may they see the errors of their ways and when it comes to elect them again, I won’t" . Amen.

 And no, folks,  I am not a red necked bigot, in case you were wondering, and I did mention that I wasn’t from here. And to close, if this has offended anyone, if any of you (aka THEY) resemble the said subjects of my rant, I am apologetic, the truth bites just as sure as a junkyard dog at midnight.

Good nite Bob, say hi to Bill.

Risqué’ e-mails, who you goanna call.?

Hi Joe:

How  the hell are you, thank you for your call about your cable box. Did you know it took a whole beer to talk you thru the process of finding out what was wrong with it.? And another beer to just recall why you had to take it back and exchange it. Be sure to call me anytime because that’s the only time I get a break and a beer because I am helping out. Yes, de Boy Scout rides again.

Since we are on the subject of the cable, did you know there are less and less people that I can send any risqué’ e-mails too?. yes, I got a few the other day and I lmao and then when I thought whom I can send this too, you are the only name on file of a smut list. Only one person that has the same sense of humor and is a biker and likes to see a nude pix (full frontal) of a frosted beer bottle and steak and a naked women, the rest.??.

The people that have found religion and are boring again, send of course e-mails with religious content and you must forward this to 75 people within 30 seconds or risk the perils that are described if you all don’t. I am very happy for them and I wish them all well. Those guys are on my did not call list and immediate spam or sooner list. I have over 75 friends but I don’t have 30 seconds to complete the task. NO, sir.!!.

Then there are the seniors list that think I am a senior or its all the e-mails about prunes and other medical problems that I didn’t know existed until I got them. Just to be sure I did a quick scan of the of the net to be sure I was “organism free”, well I know that I ain’t orgasm free. These guys would not want to see my forwards either because their pace makers aren’t combat version , they have the condo version, so you know there could be some 911 calls. No, sir not them.

So, the only other person could be my son. Now, here’s where it gets crossing the line. You see he is younger, so if I sent them to him, would I be guilty of corruption of the youth. Or could I be classed as a dirty old man, wow, I bath regular even if its only on Saturday. Some of the misses friends think I am dirty old man, must be jealous or something. Truth is, I like what I know and I know what I like and you know what I like and they know what I like and proud of it.  So, I take it there is nothing to “not like”??

*better reread that, even I am confused.(bottom line, I like what I like).

Well, enough of the horse shit I gotta get back to salt mine aka bath room pissers, those kids couldn’t hit the side of a barn with a tail wind at their backs. No, wonder little boys want to be firemen, because they can …………,and you can think what ever you want here.!!

See later.



Who are you gonna call?